Hello World

I've been in a slump.

My blogging abilities = suckage
(Sorry mom for the vulgarity)

I've had a lot "grouchiness" and "rants" as of late. These are internet words applied to blog posts that allow me to talk about things that drive me crazy without being annoying* or egotistical. Everyone rants these days. It's normal apparently.

And I haven't been reading much so I'm grasping at straws for weekend words. (This week I'll feature an angst-y excerpt from a teenage author. Awesome.)

But I used to have a lot of funny anecdotes to tell. Mood-wise, February always puts me in a slump. I love snow. Adore it. But there has been approximately .3 inches this entire winter, which is not worth the Vitamin D withdrawals.

So in an effort to break from crabbiness, a few humorous thoughts/events of the past little while. Separately none of them were long enough to blog about, but a combination isn't so bad.

1. Red pants are apparently the most susceptible for plumber's syndrome. I've noticed this with mine - and would like to formally apologize to anyone in this world who's been scarred. But the girl behind me in the library suffered from this too. And her white lacy thong did nothing to cover the rather large gap between a short shirt and lowwww pants. I think my granny panties probably do a better job.

2. Underwear updates on the blog. Impressive.

3. Texting this boy. (He's on a social media fast, meaning I can spread all sorts of rumors*** about him and he won't know till Easter) Usually we end up making each other snort in the library, my favorite way to impress strangers. For example:

Ryan: Guess who's sitting across from me in the computer?
Me: D. Sepia** (a boy I kind of dated and then broke up with.)
Ryan: How'd you know?
Me: I know everything. Blow him a kiss for me.
Ryan: No, I will not do that. I'll just rub his leg from under the table, then whisper, "from Sierra..."
Me: I'm blogging about this

4. Mocking tacky bridal shots and annoying love photo albums on the book of faces with this girl. And then naming my own prospective love albums. Working titles: Love's Blessings. My Favorite Fairytale. Southern Lovers.

5. Realizing that the little link icon is actually a world. I think. From here it looks like angry eyes on a frog.

6. My boss telling me it's painful to use the bathroom because she worked out her legs and consequently can't squat.

That last one was too much

7. Writing research questions about racial profiling while the tough looking foreign man next to me played classical music loud enough to be heard from his headphones.

8. The music was the really weepy violin type. And I was taking a final.

Peace and Blessings.

*ok so maybe still a little annoying. and egotistical
** Not his real name - to protect the innocent. But I'm sure you can figure it out.
*** did you know he has a dead body in his backyard?